8 Grocery Store Habits That Need To Go – And 8 Retro Touches We Wish Would Come Back

Ever walked into a grocery store just to emerge 40 minutes later, dazed, confused, and gripping a receipt longer than your arm? Yeah, same.

These days, the supermarket feels less like a place to grab milk and more like a chaotic maze of plastic packaging, glitchy self-checkouts, and mystery pricing thanks to good ol’ shrinkflation.

As I fumbled with a bag that refused to open and scanned the same loaf of bread three times, I found myself longing for the simple joys of yesteryear—like the friendly “paper or plastic?” from a real-life bag boy or the warm, yeasty hug of a bakery aisle actually baking bread.

So let’s hit pause on the madness and rewind a little. In this post, we’ll say “see ya” to eight modern grocery habits that need to be kicked to the curb, and throw open the automatic doors for eight vintage shopping charms that are long overdue for a comeback. Let’s shop like it’s 1979, shall we?

1. Self-Checkout Chaos

Self-checkout stands — they’re supposed to be the fast lane, but often feel like the slow march of doom. Cool in theory, these machines promise a speedy escape but usually lead to waving desperately for assistance.

I once stood there, juggling a bag of oranges and my dignity, waiting for “approval” like a teen buying spray paint. It’s a dance of beeping barcodes and flashing lights, but rarely do they play in harmony.

Wouldn’t it be swell if these mechanical nightmares could actually recognize when you’ve scanned an item properly? Until then, I guess we just wait for approval, hoping the machine gods smile upon us. Next time, maybe I’ll bring a book.

2. Shrinkflation Sneak Attacks

Ever noticed how the packaging looks the same, but the snack quantity seems to have vanished into thin air? Shrinkflation is the culprit, keeping prices constant while slimming down the contents.

I grabbed a bag of my favorite cookies, only to find half the usual amount inside. It’s enough to make anyone feel like they’ve been conned by snack-sized lies.

These stealthy shrinkage tactics are like the ninja warriors of the grocery aisles, quietly reducing our joy one nibble at a time. Next shopping trip, I’ll be wielding a magnifying glass, inspecting packages with the scrutiny of a detective.

3. Overloaded Loyalty Apps

Loyalty apps, designed to reward us, now demand more from us than a first date. Want to buy milk? Better be ready to log in, scan a QR code, and possibly offer up your firstborn.

In a world where technology is supposed to simplify, these apps have turned into digital mazes, leaving us longing for simplicity. I just want to buy my groceries without performing a technological circus act at the register.

Could we dial down the complexity and bring back straightforward savings? Until then, I’ll keep my phone charged and my patience tested.

4. Plastic Everywhere

Plastic, plastic everywhere, and not a spot to spare! It’s a waste buffet featuring individually wrapped bananas and double-bagged everything. It’s like we’ve declared war on the environment one plastic sheet at a time.

I once bought a single apple, only to have it double-bagged and then placed in another plastic bag — a touch excessive, don’t you think?

With plastic infiltrating every corner of the store, it’s high time we rethink our relationship with it. Perhaps a return to paper bags or reusables could help turn the tide. Until then, I’ll keep recycling and dreaming of a plastic-free paradise.

5. Mystery Produce Pricing

Mystery produce pricing is like a game show, but with less fun and more confusion. Walk into a store, and suddenly you’re playing “Guess That Price!” Why does this apple cost $7, and what even is a “market price” for strawberries?

I’ve faced the perplexity of standing in the produce section, wondering if I need to take out a loan for a bunch of grapes. It seems like the cost of fresh food is as unpredictable as the weather.

Is it too much to ask for a little transparency in pricing? Until then, I’ll keep my calculator handy and my hopes high for a more straightforward produce section.

6. Product Rearranging Sorcery

Just when you know where everything is, it’s like the aisles are playing an elaborate game of grocery Tetris. Product rearranging sorcery is the art form no one asked for, leaving us lost in a place we thought we knew.

I’ve spent countless moments wandering the store, searching for peanut butter that had mysteriously migrated to the jelly aisle. It’s a puzzling phenomenon that seems designed to keep us guessing.

Could we not play hide and seek with essential items? Until then, I’ll wander the aisles like a modern-day explorer, ever-searching for that elusive jar of pickles.

7. Endless Email Signups at Checkout

“Would you like to enter your email for 10% off?” they ask, as if tempting us with forbidden fruit. Honestly, I just want my cereal without committing to inbox overload.

The checkout lane has transformed into a portal for newsletters I never knew I needed. While discounts are delightful, my email is not a dumping ground.

How about a little peace at the register? Until then, I’ll keep my email close and my discounts closer, navigating checkout like a seasoned pro.

8. Music That’s Either Elevator or EDM

Music in grocery stores swings wildly from funeral-slow elevator tunes to full-on EDM raves. It’s a sonic roller coaster that leaves shoppers yearning for a middle ground.

I once found myself bopping to techno beats in the bread aisle, wondering if I should grab a loaf or start a dance party. While both options have their appeal, a little musical moderation wouldn’t hurt.

Imagine ‘70s funk or ‘90s pop serenading your shopping trip. Until then, I’ll hum along to the musical madness that is grocery store ambiance.

9. In-Store Butchers and Deli Experts

Remember when in-store butchers knew your name and your preferred cut of meat? Real humans crafted the perfect slice, unlike today’s plastic-wrapped mystery meats.

I’ve had many a conversation with these meat maestros, their expertise unmatched and their stories engaging.

It’s an art form, lost to modern convenience. Nostalgia calls for a return to skilled hands creating culinary perfection. Until then, I’ll fondly recall those flavorful days of yore.

10. Grocery Bag Boys Who Insisted on Helping

There was a time when grocery bag boys treated you like royalty, bagging groceries and escorting you to your car with a smile.

These young knights of the parking lot were always ready to lend a hand, turning mundane errands into regal experiences.

Their service, now a rarity, brought charm and camaraderie to shopping. Until the royal service returns, I’ll carry my own bags while dreaming of those gallant days.

11. Free Samples with Flair

Free samples used to come with flair, not just a morsel but an experience. Toothpicks, sizzling skillets, and enthusiastic grandmas enticing you to “just try a bite.”

I’ve tasted more than my share of delectable bites offered with warmth and gusto, turning shopping into a culinary adventure.

Gone are the sample stations filled with charm and savory surprises. Until they return, I’ll savor the memories of those delightful nibbles.

12. Grocery Store “Green Stamps” and Prizes

Green stamps were the rewards that turned shopping into a treasure hunt. Spend $10, get stamps, save them up for a toaster—it made every purchase feel like a step toward something grand.

I’ve collected my fair share, eyeing prizes with glee as I filled my stamp book. The anticipation was rich in delight.

Though these motivational gems have faded, the thrill they brought remains cherished. Until treasure hunts return, I’ll reminisce about my prize-filled past.

13. Checker Who Actually Talked to You

Imagine a checker who knew your name, asked about your week, and didn’t scan your eggs like bricks.

These friendly faces turned checkouts into conversations, adding warmth to the grocery aisle.

Though now replaced by hurried scans, their memory lingers as a reminder of days when shopping felt personal. Until we chat again, I’ll cherish those conversational lanes.

14. Handwritten Signs and Chalkboards

Gone are the days when prices were scribbled in bold colors with flair, offering charm that digital tickers can’t match.

Handwritten signs and chalkboards added character to the shopping experience, turning aisles into art galleries.

Though now replaced by digital displays, their whimsy remains etched in memory. Until flair returns, I’ll remember those vibrant and personal touches.

15. In-Store Cafés or Diners

End your shopping spree with a trip to an in-store café, where a malt and grilled cheese awaited as a reward. These cozy corners offered more than food—they offered a respite.

I’ve enjoyed many a snack in these diners, savoring their charm as much as the food itself.

While modern stores race past the idea, the allure of in-store cafés lingers in memory. Until they reopen, I’ll savor the taste of nostalgia.

16. Scent of Fresh Bread or Roasting Chickens

What could be more inviting than the scent of fresh bread or roasting chickens? These aromas were a siren call to the soul, far more enticing than the faint whiff of cleaning products.

I’ve followed these delicious trails, led by my senses to the source of such savory delights.

Though modern stores may lack this olfactory magic, the memory remains a delicious reminder of shopping’s fragrant past. Until then, I’ll follow my nose to memories of yore.