15 Things From the ’80s We Couldn’t Wait to Leave Behind
The 1980s gave us some amazing stuff like MTV and the Walkman, but not everything from that decade was worth keeping. For every great ’80s invention or trend, there was something truly cringe-worthy that made us count the days until the ’90s arrived.
Looking back, these awkward, uncomfortable, and sometimes downright bizarre ’80s phenomena make us wonder what we were thinking.
1. Mullet Haircuts
Nothing screams ’80s fashion disaster quite like the mullet. “Business in front, party in the back” became the unfortunate motto for this hairstyle catastrophe that infected men across America.
Even worse, the mullet wasn’t just for average Joes—celebrities from Billy Ray Cyrus to Patrick Swayze rocked this hair monstrosity. The photos that remain continue to haunt yearbooks everywhere.
2. Shoulder Pads On Everything
Whoever decided women should look like linebackers deserves a special place in fashion hell. Shoulder pads transformed normal clothing into ridiculous power suits that made doorways a navigational challenge.
These foam monstrosities weren’t just in blazers—they invaded dresses, blouses, and even t-shirts. The silhouette they created was less hourglass and more refrigerator, making everyone look like they were preparing for a football scrimmage.
3. Acid-Washed Jeans
Jeans that looked like they’d been attacked by bleach were a lifestyle. These spotted denim disasters somehow convinced an entire generation that splotchy pants were the height of cool.
The harsh chemical process actually weakened the fabric, meaning your fashion statement would eventually disintegrate. Paired with their uncomfortably tight fit and high waists, these jeans were as impractical as they were ugly.
4. Neon Everything
Walking down the street in the ’80s was like staring directly into the sun. Neon colors assaulted our eyeballs from every direction—clothing, accessories, even makeup came in radioactive shades of pink, green, and yellow.
The worst offenders were those neon sweatshirts with matching spandex bike shorts. Entire aerobics classes glowed like toxic waste dumps. Subtle fashion choices? The ’80s never heard of them.
5. Permed Hair Disasters
The smell of perm solution still triggers PTSD for many who lived through the ’80s. These chemical nightmares transformed straight hair into tight, frizzy curls that resembled ramen noodles more than actual hairstyles.
Hours spent at the salon resulted in damaged, fried hair that required industrial-strength hairspray to maintain. The worst part? When it grew out, leaving you with curly ends and straight roots—a look no one could pull off.
6. Parachute Pants
MC Hammer made these shiny, baggy monstrosities famous, but he should have kept them to himself. Made from nylon that swished loudly with every step, parachute pants announced your presence before you entered a room.
The pants clung awkwardly at the ankles while ballooning ridiculously at the thighs. Despite their name, jumping from an airplane wearing these would have been a terrible idea—though no worse than wearing them in public.
7. Cassette Tape Tangles
Remember when your favorite song suddenly sounded like it was being performed underwater? That’s when you knew your cassette tape had been eaten by your player, creating a spaghetti-like mess of magnetic tape.
Fixing these disasters involved carefully winding the tape back using a pencil, often resulting in permanent creases. Even worse were the mixtapes from crushes that got destroyed, taking your romantic hopes with them into that mangled plastic grave.
8. Fanny Packs
The ultimate fashion crime masquerading as practical storage. These zippered pouches sat directly over your stomach, or worse, your actual fanny, creating an unflattering bulge no one needed.
Available in neon colors and tacky patterns, they screamed “tourist” or “I value my calculator watch collection too much to leave it at home.” The recent fanny pack revival proves we’ve learned nothing from our past fashion sins.
9. Wood Paneling Everywhere
Nothing dates a home like the dark, fake wood paneling that covered walls, station wagons, and basement rec rooms throughout the ’80s. This faux lumber look managed to make spaces feel simultaneously cheap and claustrophobic.
The worst offenders featured knots and grain patterns that repeated every few inches. Removing this design disaster typically revealed perfectly good drywall underneath, making us wonder why anyone thought covering it with plastic wood was an improvement.
10. Hair Metal Bands
Men with bigger hair and more makeup than most women dominated ’80s music. These spandex-clad rockers spent more time on their appearance than on writing memorable songs.
Bands like Poison and Mötley Crüe strutted around in animal prints and leather while singing power ballads about broken hearts. The combination of screeching vocals, pyrotechnics, and hairspray created a perfect storm of ridiculousness that couldn’t survive the grunge revolution.
11. Leg Warmers With Everything
Thanks to Flashdance and Fame, these knitted tubes meant for dancers somehow became everyday fashion items. People wore them with shorts, skirts, and even formal wear, creating a bizarre look that suggested your calves were perpetually chilly while the rest of you was fine.
The chunky, often neon-colored warmers bunched unattractively around ankles and created strange bulges under pants. Their primary function seemed to be collecting dirt and getting caught in bicycle chains.
12. Waterbeds
Nothing says “I make questionable decisions” quite like filling your bedroom with hundreds of gallons of water. These sloshing sleep surfaces were uncomfortable, impractical, and constantly threatening to flood your home.
Getting in required a careful technique to avoid creating waves that would make you seasick. Even worse, they needed to be heated (raising your electric bill) and required regular maintenance with special chemicals.
13. Massive Car Phones
Before smartphones, we had car phones—clunky contraptions with curly cords and antennas that screamed “I’m very important!” These brick-sized status symbols weighed several pounds and had battery life measured in minutes.
Making calls cost approximately a month’s salary per minute, but that didn’t stop people from very publicly conducting business while driving. The reception was terrible, the convenience minimal, but the showing-off potential was enormous.
14. Aerobics Fashion Crimes
Jane Fonda has a lot to answer for. The aerobics craze spawned a fashion disaster zone of high-cut leotards, headbands, and leg warmers that somehow escaped the gym and infiltrated everyday wear.
Women voluntarily wore outfits that combined the worst wedgie imaginable with the constant threat of chafing. The fabrics were typically shiny, synthetic, and completely unbreathable—perfect for activities that made you sweat profusely.
15. New Coke Fiasco
April 23, 1985: the day Coca-Cola committed corporate seppuku by replacing its beloved formula with “New Coke.” This sweeter, Pepsi-like imposter triggered nationwide outrage and hoarding of remaining original Coke supplies.
The company received over 400,000 angry letters and calls from betrayed customers. After just 79 days, they reintroduced the original as “Coca-Cola Classic” in what became a textbook marketing disaster.